Lonliness...

The past few days, my dog, companion, and best friend, Sadie has been ailing...

Sadie is a Black Lab/Daschuand mix (don't ask... only realize that there was probably a box involved somewhere)!

I've had Sadie for many years. She is 12 - 13 years old, with the typical Lab greying on her snout... she is a very good girl! As mentioned before, also a good friend and companion.

She is the kind of dog that always wants to be where you are. If I get up and go into the kitchen, she is there (probably hoping for a milkbone or dropped food), if I go into the bedroom, she is there (probably hoping to be invited up onto the bed), if I go into the bathroom, she is there (why? I'm not sure, other than it's because I'm in there....)

When I go outside, I have to tell her to stay and that I'll be back; otherwise, she expects that I will take her with me! However, when I come home... she is right there, excited, and seemingly thankful for my return!

Does she ever get lonely? That is a question I have often asked myself. Being alone is one thing, but being lonely is another. I don't think Sadie is lonely! She is with me almost 16 hours a day! We are together, we go for walks, we play...

But she is left alone sometimes... well behaved and house trained too (which probably explains why she is so happy and excited to see me when I do come home ;) ....)

But what about me?

I live alone, except for Sadie, but am I lonely?

I must admit, I do sometimes feel lonely. It's a weekend, I have no plans, and I have nothing to do, nowhere to be, no events... That's when being alone can start to become lonely!

I have many friends between my work and Church. Trying to balance invitations with beliefs and committments though, has often been trying! I could be very socially active and not alone most of the time! However, for this time in my life I choose to be alone. I enforce aloneness upon myself. But for the most part, I am not lonely! I have many activities, many friends, many outlets... and a dog!

So, Sadie has not been eating as much lately, she has been sleeping a lot, limping a bit when we go for walks...

She's an old dog. It makes me worry and think that she will not be around forever. Her leaving me, makes me sad. It brings up emotions and feelings that I might truly be alone...

At the same time, I am thankful for the time we had together! She has taught me so many things! First and foremost, it's not all about me! There are others in this world that need my attention and care. Sometimes that means self-sacrifice, but none-the-less, the rewards are far greater than the costs! Second, unconditional love is a precious thing! There are, by my experience, five things in this life that provide unconditional love! I have been honored and privaleged to experience four of them! Third, there is a difference between being alone and being lonely! Think for a moment about how much time you spend alone. In the bathroom, in a car, in an elevator, an office, in a line, etc. You may be alone, but there are others around you! People in a similiar or nearly same state as you! You can choose to be lonely...

Reach out...