March in Flagstaff

Although it has been quite some time since I have posted, at least since my immediate departure... I felt moved to do so tonight.

It is somewhat interesting that it has been a almost a year since my most serious blogs... that I am now back from spending a week in Haiti... now back in Flagstaff for almost a month... yet I have not shared with anyone outside of my immediate group that went in a serious manner! Call it "Stockholm," call it decompression, call it "normalization..."

It is interesting that I was overwhelmed by the 80+ degree temperatures... the 80+% humidity in Haiti... experienced a few aftershocks.... (aka... "butt" surfing, literally... Pardon the pun...) but, that is another story!

I have just come home to my apartment tonight, and it is 37 degrees F... I am wearing my T-Shirt, and have no need or want to put on a jacket! Most would think it is cold, at least cool enough to wear a little something more than just a t-shirt...

It is a welcome relief!

My experience in Haiti was life changing! I am prepared and planning to return! One person called it!

I have found my true calling...

Haiti is now beginning to experiencing there rainy season... increased risk for malaria and dengue fever... not to mention cholera, typhoid, and dysentery due to poor living conditions... hurricane season is right around the corner...

I have devoted my life to helping and serving others... I have often risked my life (albeit under controlled conditions) in a various number of ways.

This is one of the few ways that has been totally beyond my control. It is both frightening and exhilarating at the same time! I was both fearful, yet at the same time completely at peace!

What a strange dichotomy...

My going to Haiti in February was something that I committed to do. The commitment was something I was in complete control of, to do or not to do, the outcome less certain...

I am still on alert for the next six months from my return, looking out for tropical diseases, Malaria being the least of my worries...

It is interesting that I have committed to return in April!

My family, even my children have questioned me. Are you ready? How can you even think about it? Are we not as important? More and even more...

The need is so great, I answer them, "How can you not even think I wouldn't return!"

It is something beyond an individual's self-worth. It is way beyond an individual's need. It is, at least I believe, beyond even a basic human's response...

This is at the most basic of all things... beyond a fatalistic view that one will die helping others... beyond even the idea that one will be able to help just one person in need, when they need it, when it needs to happen...

Helping others in a greater need than yourself!

I admit that I have problems and issues. I once thought they were great! Now I know they are minuscule compared to what I have seen and experienced... I am humbled and am greatly ashamed for claiming my burden as notable! I only hope that my God will forgive me that I thought my hardships were unbearable!

Haiti is but a metaphor for my life! I thought so many things were important, I now realize they are not! The Haitians had nothing to begin with... after the earthquake, they have less than nothing!

I saw streets, parts of the City of Port Au' Prince... although the earthquake occurred almost 6 or 7 weeks ago, it literally looked like it occurred yesterday!

For everyone that thinks they have problems, I only wish they could spend but a day in Haiti! Not even... just part of a day... just a few hours driving through Port Au' Prince! All of your problems, concerns, cares... everything you felt was important... you would feel guilty about!